the effect you created.                                                      

The white painting surface, I sit in front of it and there is nothing on it. It simulates the void. I move my hand, I create an effort, use a brush or charcoal, an idea comes to me in my imagination, sometimes complete and sometimes in the form of an undefined energy. that energy that passes to the surface. An effect is created on the paper. Any shapes, colors, black, white, and the effect created is no longer mine. It exists on the surface in its own right. It exists in the world of reality which is everyone's world. Maybe someone will come and see it, maybe I will upload it on the social network, and whoever sees the work will remember it at least for a short time, maybe express an emotion towards it. It's already in a playing field that is not mine anymore. The creation as it unfolds releases energy onto the painting surface. my energy. The creative occurrence is one-time. When it ends, the creation stops and disappears. I have flowed a large amount of energy out and now it is flowing back in to me through the senses, image, sound or touch. it is there in front of me, looking at me and I look back at it. I am the one who created the energy and flowed it out. And now it flows back to me as an actual mirror in its own right, a painting, a sculpture or anything I created. I have to ask myself if I like what I see. I loved doing and creating when it was being created. Now the question is do I like the effect I created. Do I like the painting? Am I looking through the eyes of those I would like to love my creation on the painting surface  or only through my own  eyes.  And now someone will come and say oh what a beautiful effect you created or oh it's terrible. All this belongs to the observer and this is his point of view and this is his world. The act of creating the energy out while in the storm of doing it  can be wonderful. Is the painting  I created is still beautiful after its completion?  Depends on what I wanted  to create  in the first place  and whether I succeeded in doing so.  in any case, the picture  that was made and is standing in front of me is already something else. It’s an object. To be completely happy  with the picture I created requires that what comes out is equal in intensity to what came into being while creating it. Viewing a work is a re-creation but these are opposite flows. One I caused and creates and the other accepts and agrees. It's funny to say I have to agree to the effect I created. The painting stands in front of me and it already stands on its own merits. Now it has an effect on me. I am in a position of acceptance of what was created before. Something in its power has to match. The simpler it will be, say to draw a square, or a circle, or just a point, maybe it will be more balanced than any complex creative process that comes out during the creation when i know how i started the painting but often so surprised after its completion by the result and based on feelings and  my personal world of content, ascension and descent in that storm of creation, where you don't always know what you will get on the other side of that process.  The painting  you have now painted is in the physical world possibly hanging on a wall and it is streaming light to you . The color you placed carefully or in a storm of emotions during the creation are not necessarily what you get after it ends in the sensory, emotional and cognitive experience. When a child draws hand paintings as we remember from our early childhood in kindergarten, he greatly enjoys the action full of movement and feeling. The result he sees afterwards is perhaps much less interesting, he does admire the effect he was able to create and the kindergarten teacher's reaction but loses interest because he sees many colors on the paper that expresses the exciting action but is not always necessarily beautiful in his eyes. And yet artists admire their own work and want others to enjoy it. on the other hand, they look at the paintings  they made years ago and there is a certain indifference to them because the joy  was in the process of creating it  and not in seeing it again. Sometimes they have already moved on to another matter in the work and it seems old and irrelevant to them to the extent that they ask themselves "Did I paint this"? They may be happy to sell, they may be happy to love and admire the work and the attention and respect that comes with it, but strong creators will generally look at the future and their next work and not at what they have done. Sometimes you look at everything you've done with satisfaction and it's a wide collection of works you've painted over the years, some of which you really like and some of which maybe less and it makes you happy with yourself for what you managed to create anyway and that's already from a different point of view. Every artist should ask himself if he likes the works he has made.  Do they excite him? Wasn't the moment of the creation itself worth much more than anything that happened with these works after a distance of time. Would he change anything in them if he were to create them now, including how much he likes to create and whether the creation after its creation is important to him. The relationship between the painter and his work varies from artist to artist. The artist also changes over the years and his attitude towards the art he created. For me, the intensity of the experience of the creative process precedes the final product which is  the painting  itself, which looks at me after it has been done. But like any proud father, I want to be proud of my children even if they are not perfect.